The last month or so, just have felt completely and totally isolated from my fellow followers of Christ, been some bright moments in there but they seem to be few and far between. I have come to completely dread walking into church service and have gotten to the point that I am taking an indefinite time off of church and sunday school, will fulfill my time at midweek to continue lead and facilitate but nothing else.
I also have decided as of right now, I am only going to be "just friends" with people and nothing more. Period, end of story. Any greater commitment seems to lead to disappontment.
It seems like and probably is, a time of testing and trial for my faith and Who I put my faith in. Have heard barely audible whispers on both side of me, from God and the enemy, one telling me not to put my dependence on people within my sunday school class but to depend on Him for my needs and the other whispering that the class will inevitably let me down and not to take time to invest myself.
Yes, I have gone from positive about life and people, to pretty much negative but as said before I don't always acknowledge my problems or allow people to see I'm struggling.
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